Team Flare II

by themetaknightmare

Here, I’m going to go over the accomplishments of the other Leagues of Villanous Evildoers Maniacally United For Frightening Investments in Naughtiness, and try to prove my point about why team flare is the worst.

Team Rocket:
Goal: World Domination
Region: Kanto
Deeds on the way: Finding fossils to sell for profit, recruiting trainers with bribes and promises of power, hostage situation leading to Pokémon death, overrunning major corpoation, teaching the benefits of gambling to children, stealing and selling Pokémon for profit.
Pokémon are: A means to world domination. Team rocket will have the best and steal the rest.
Leader: Giovanni. He tests you multiple times throughout the game, and finally at the Viridian city Gym. Promises to disband team rocket after you defeat him there. Which leads us to…

Team Rocket:
Goal: World Domination
Region: Johto, Kanto
Deeds on the way: Detailing of Slowpokes in Azela town, forcing evolution and rampage in serene tourist locations, hijacking outdated communication methods to reach their old leader, having old leader return only to be defeated by time travelers. Also, stealing from the power plant.
Pokémon are: A means to world domination. Team rocket will have the best and steal the rest.
Leader: Archer. Doesn’t show up until the Goldenrod Radio Tower attack, where he reveals he’s retiring from his position do let Giovanni have it back. Loses and has to retire anyways.

Team Magma/Aqua:
Goal: Expansion of Land/Seamass for the “good of the planet”
Region: Hoenn
Deeds on the way: Harassment of Devon Corporation’s Great Ball Carrier, extreme line waiting, stealing extraterrestrial objects from scientists, causing/preventing a volcano’s eruption, stealing terrestrial objects from scientists, stealing aquatic objects from scientists, stealing rocks from old people, awakening ancient Pokémon to cause weather changes around the world.
Pokémon are: Forces of nature we can control. Right? Guys? Why is Groudon/Kyogre walking towards me? Help please OH GOD THERE’S SO MUCH SUN/RAIN!!
Leader: Archie/Maxie. Fights the player a few times. Apparently REALLY likes stealing stuff from scientists and water/fire types. Realizes that they have as much control over Kyogre/Groudon as a weatherman has over the weather when it’s too late. Useless after that point.

Team Galactic:
Goal: Reboot the Universe
Deeds along the way: Stealing from professors, stealing power from renewable energy resources, taking electronic encyclopedias from minors, threatening to have a bomb, detonating the bomb that was previously threatened, extreme hiking, summoning representations of time and space, making Looker look like a fool, entering alternate dimensions, erupting volcanos.
Pokémon are: Tools and means to an end.
Leader: Cyrus. Wants to reboot the universe so that he can be god. Never lived up to his parents expectations. Stole the Pokémon that represent humanities greatest strengths – willpower, emotion, and knowledge. Slightly obsessed with his idea, so he stays outside of reality to try it.

Team Plasma:
Goal: World Domination
Deeds along the way: Kicking Pokémon, stealing Pokémon, stealing dead Pokémon, harassing the elderly, riding Ferris Wheels, hiding in cold places and plotting, employment of ninjas, befriending dragons, building a hotel and calling it a castle, said castle causing millions in damages to irreplaceable parts of the elite four, getting angry at your own children, ice lazers,
Pokémon are: wild and free, and should be released from the captivity of trainers. Except for ours.
Leader: Ghestis. N is apparently the leader, but is really just being controlled by his father. He came up with the best plan for world domination in my opinion; in the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king. He also used ninjas, which I’m surprised no one else had up to that point.

So these are your other evil organizations. I realized how silly they all are while writing this; but team flare has still had the least impact on me. Tomorrow, the comparisonating!

Smell ya later!

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